Friday, April 07, 2006

A test ride

I focused hard this morning, saying affirmations and also incorporating body energy. I focused on the base of my spine and visualized on that area. A belt of energy grabbed a hold of this area and I continued deeper into meditation. Many things kept distracting me, an itchy nose, birds chirping, and background noise to Dora the Explorer. So I made a final attempt to relax my muscles, and finally my mind started to do its 'thing'. I tried to envision what a mind-split would actually look like once it got started. I saw two hands criss-crossing/clasping itself. In other words, when the mind-split begins, energies warp past each other and then split apart. I then saw an image of two people. We can never occupy the same space of each other, as our bodies limit us to that. But this mind-split shows me that both my physical and spiritual body can merge into the same space and with that split apart. This is what I was shown, and to me makes sense. Perhaps you will be shown another picture to understand your experience.
It was time, the split was in its prime, like a running engine in a car that's been warmed up. I looked to my right with my physical eyes and the frequency increased 3 fold. I started to listen to mental chatter, I heard a voice I didn't care to hear. I tried to push my astral body up as it was time to travel. I thought of Diane (guide) and said a loud,' Okay!' as if I was ready for her assistance two minutes ago. I was yanked very hard and fast and carried backwards. All I could do was laugh as I passed through many barriers. I told Diane while I was still chuckling and admiring her technique, 'i gotta love ya'. My vision was blurred and I asked for clarity.
I came through one ceiling or wall with many tiles on it. It was white and a thought can to me asking if I could pass through. The tile started to fall at random locations and I slowly passed through that. I was pulled back into my body, and I heard Diane very clearly through my right side of my mind. She was frustrated with her attempt, she said with a sigh, 'A door closed that I want you to see'. I tried to tell her telepathically that I wanted to try again. As I let out air from my lungs with my mouth closed, I closed my throat area and gasped,' hold on!'. This was the only way I could think of to talk to her other than my mind. I didn't know if she was still around to help, so I hurried to get another mind-split going. I felt apprehension from someone, as if they thought I couldn't start this thing up again for myself. Well, I did. It was like starting an old car back up. I thought if everything I could and done in the past. I relaxed my muscles, looked to the right with my eyes, focused on my third eye, focused on the frequency getting stronger, and even remembered the hands clasping. The mind-split was barely turned on, it was a struggle to keep it stayed turned on. It kept loosing its force. I gasped 'wait! I'm coming', as silly as that sounds, I wanted to make sure she didn't go anywhere. In an instant, it felt as if I were jabbed or poked in the abdomen that forced adrenalin to burst within me. This is the feeling you get when you feel a thousand 'butterflies' in your belly. I 'sobered' up or napped out of it fast. I opened my eyes and thought 'damn'. I said sorry to Diane, but I was unsure if maybe Diane ended my challenge knowing I would fail or maybe I was exhausting precious energy for nothing.

Wednesday, April 05, 2006

The universe and a melting hand

As I began to take my nap, I said my affirmations 'Now I am out of Body'. I repeated this several times. I wanted to double check my reality, I knew I was conscious. I knew my daughter was in the living room watching her morning shows, I could hear her. I knew it was just after 930AM. I knew I was facing my bedroom door.
I confirmed I was still in the here and now and not in sleep land, I was in a meditative state but fully aware. Good, now I was ready for another adventure. I was just hoping my 4 yr old wouldn't run in a beg for a popsicle, like she usually does.
I have been consciously making myself try to sit up, without moving my physical body. I would just imagine myself sit up and imagine in my head the details it would take to actually do all this. I imagined that my head would raise up and I would push myself up with my hands and then my shoulders would move up, etc... I then returned back to my affirmations and I felt the loudness of the mind-split begin to happen.
With my eyes closed, I felt myself moving onto my back, I could of swore my physical body was doing this, but I knew it wasn't. I was slowing turning around to my left side and it felt like I was rubbing against the bed during this slow going spin. I thought myself 'out'. I glided out without being able to see anything. I was free of my body.
I was in some kind of tunnel or warped space and I demanded clarity so I could see something. I saw an image ahead of me, it was bright. I came up to it quickly and calmly, thinking this ability of mine is past phenomenal.
What I saw was incredible and made me want to cry, laugh and cheer. I said outloud in the astral 'Oh, my god!' It was something my physical brain couldn't handle, I know it. I was in the middle of the universe, but not in the physical universe. I felt all the planets as pure energy and this place had a life of its own. Thousands of different sized, colored planets rotated around me. They were not close by any means, but they were all visible in the distance. I reached out in fron tof me to feel what I could. I watched my hand as it started to melt/blow away. Starting from the tips of my fingers, my hand seemed to slowly diminish. It was astonishing to look at. The melting effect lasted until it got my my elbow, then I was done watching. My theory is that I really don't have a body in this realm, it's just an illusion that I can keep only for so long.
I felt as if I need to catch my breath, but I had none. I was pulled to my left, towards a wall of clouds. They seemed infinite, as I passed through them. I came to another dimension almost the same as the last, but not as beautiful. I came immediately back to the original place. I took my last look and thought I wanted to come back soon. The beauty was familiar and addicting, something I could stare at for eternity.